Sunday, June 29, 2008
It was my last day at work on the 27th night.
I was feeling very bitter and fragile, stuck in my own thinkings of did i make the wrong or right decision on leaving and mum even asked, "So do you regret on leaving ?" Well i couldn't answer. And dad's been counting down the days of driving me to work. Belleven text me, made me feel worse. And when i'm at the workplace, i couldn't resist and brokedown. "You've to be strong." "You can always come back to visit us." These are lines people said to me. It never crossed my mind that i'll miss them this much even people i dislike. Why is that ? And what's worse Azhar said that honestly it's sad to see me leave cause i'm one of his and GRO's favourite. Can you imagine how i felt then ?! And felt that it's best for me to leave, like i deserve better. Sigh, it's too late. I gave him the card i made by myself, he sent me a text well a longer than usual text. I was truly happy and again i teared, secretly. Belleven bought me a cake from Canele, gosh why spend on such expansive cake. And there's a note saying " Do Not Touch For Baby Grace." Man i went soft inside, it was written by him ! Oh Bell mummy and Alex i miss you so ! Did a final OT today (28th) and when i left the place, i saw him, he stood in front of me blocking my passage and how i want to give him a hug but couldn't (status lah). So he just put his hand on my shoulder saying not a word but gave a smile. He said (in chinese) "Ni zhang da le." No words could come out except a sigh. I text Sam, "I'll miss you guys alot alot" and she replied, "And guess who will miss you too ?" Sam said, "We'll meet up very soon, we will." I believe so.
12:26 AM
Sunday, June 15, 2008
The 11th of June 2008. The day that i resigned. Talked to Bell with a heavy heart, she gave me alternative but i rejected; people found out still although i kept low profile. It was hard giving them an answer. Don't really feel good. Well maybe i should update again once i'm better.The Hardest Thing
1:18 AM
Tuesday, June 03, 2008
[Verse 1]Beep Beep oh look now there goes my phoneAnd once again im just hoping its a text from you..mm..It aint right read your messages twice thriceFour times a night its trueEveryday I patiently waitFeeling like a fool but I do, anywayNothing can feel as sweet and as realCuz I know that I wasn't waiting in vain..[Chorus]And maybe its trueIm caught up on youMaybe there's a chance your stuck on me tooSo maybe im wrongIts all in my headMaybe we're afraid of words we both haven't said[Verse 2]Im always connected onlineLooked on facebook all the time Hoping you've checked my profileJust can't help wondering why,You play it cool but,I'm hopelessly falling for you, Every night on the phone I'm..In love with you, and I know you like it
Im caught up on you
Maybe there's a chance your stuck on me too
So maybe im wrongIts all in my head
Maybe we're afraid of words we both haven't said
[Outro]Maybe it's true..(Baby I Miss You)I'm caught up on you (Look I Want You)Maybe I am wrongBaby I miss you...
9:17 AM